Reading Time: 1 minute
Was my therapist who told me to start a blog. Then, a few sessions later she got all pissy about it.
“You talk to the world, but you barely talk to me” was the way she put it during one session.
Well, I thought, the world is more interesting than most of your sessions. So I started making stuff up each visit, see if I could rattle her a little. I knew I couldn’t get instantly outlandish. She’d see through that. So I played her a little.
Told her I had a dream. I was an exterminator in this dream. But only available for special calls, not your routine kill-some-ants or poison-some-mice kinda guy. I was an exterminator for bigger, important cases.
Long story short, I had her convinced I was an assassin. A hit man. I never admitted it. When she broached the subject that I might be hiding something with my dream, I admitted I was. “Busted,” I said. Then, hemming and hawing for fifteen minutes, I confessed that I was called into companies who needed to downsize and I fired people. She saw right through it. I was still a hit man, but trying to cover it up with a new story.
Next day I showed up when I didn’t have a session. She reminded me of that fact. I said I’m not here for a session. I’m here because your boss sent me. That ended our relationship.
Confession: I don’t have a therapist. (Maybe I need one, but I don’t have one.) That was all to lead up to my Great & Powerful Reveal Party…
April 1 begins the 2017 A to Z Blogging Challenge. March 20 (today) is the day we’re supposed to reveal our topic for the challenge. Here’s how it works. You blog every day in April, but you must go through the month alphabetically. So April 1 = A all the way until April 30 = Z. (Sundays are a day of rest.)
My topic for the 2017 A to Z Blogging Challenge: John’s Death Scene. That’s right, I’m going to write a short story death scene every day in April. My murder!
Format: Flash fiction storytelling. 100-150 words each story.
Victim: Yours Truly
Weapon: That’s our A to Z. Every day, a new weapon beginning with that day’s letter of the alphabet.
So for all you people who would love to see me off the face of the Earth, I’ll do my best impression of Wile E. Coyote every day in April. Killed in the morning, only to reincarnate overnight to suffer through another murder the very next day. It’s a tough life, but someone has to live die for it.
This will temporarily suspend our Mystery of the Week. Don’t worry, we’ll pick those back up beginning in May (assuming I survive April!). Take a guess at the first murder weapon of the month:
- Axe
- Apple
- Air Conditioner
- Arsenic
- Arrow
If you picked A, you have a decent shot at being correct. See y’all April 1!
This is gonna be good. *rubs hands, cackles.*
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Mwahahaha. Should I be concerned about the number of people liking this idea?!
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I would be.
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Hahaha, writing to die for! I can’t wait 🙂
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Oh, the waiting will kill me. But that’ll just be warm-up for April, I suppose.
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*snorting delicately*
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LOL
I can’t wait for April 1 =)
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I think that’s what Road Runner said to Wile E. Coyote before last year’s A to Z Challenge.
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Now that I have a little more time, I thought I’d come back and mention that I can’t think of a better or more deserving person to be killed 26 times.
=)
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Oh, you crack me up. I don’t know whether to be flattered or call my mother. I hope you never get a LOT more time or I’ll really start to worry about what you’re thinking!
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It will be #1 (Axe), or that’s gunna be one hell of an apple.
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I bet an Apple device has killed many a soul over the past year. And we could always go to historical fiction and make the Garden of Eden our setting for the opening story. Hmmm…
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Oh. I never thought of that. Death by iPad.
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Now THIS is right up my alley!
Looking forward to your posts. 🙂
Writer In Transit
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Michelle, by “right up your alley,” am I to decipher that you’re living the life of Wile E. Coyote? Uh oh, allow me to warn you about that cliff up ahea —
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That’s going to be quite difficult, I feel curious. I feel also sorry for the guy who is going to be killed thirty times…
My theme, postcards, is going to be less bloody (except maybe for “D”…).
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Eva, thank you for the kind sympathy. After all, it’s ME that’s going to be offed in April. Alas, it will only be a mere 26 times, not 30. We get Sundays to recover. That’s barely a full Looney Toons season for the likes of Wile E. Coyote.
I’m a come check out Postcards. Be right over!
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Right, I forget that it will be only 26 posts. But, honestly… do you think that poor John is going to appreciate the difference?
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This sounds like a must-read set of posts for me. (Because of the creativity, of course.) But why not the air conditioner? Now I have to figure out how this could kill someone.
2017 A to Z Blog Challenge Theme Reveal
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Why not the air conditioner, indeed! Tough weapon to use at long range, but if you have an unsuspecting victim like you’d have on Day One, well it seems like it could work in a couple ways. I suppose a blast of Freon would fall under “F” so we can eliminate that. But if you hid an axe behind the air conditioning unit outside…
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Unique ! Love it. Can’t wait to read of your death. 🙂
I choose the apple! Perfect!
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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. But, oh, that second apple that the evil doctor uses… my my my, the complications that arise when an evil doctor joins the story. Thanks for stopping by, Yolanda. See you in April!
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Your theme is brilliant! I will be following along because I love a good murder! I am also suffering from FOMO, ‘fear of missing ou’ because I don’t have the time to participate in the A to Z challenge this year, but that gives me more time to read other bloggers. I wonder if one could freeze to death in an air-conditioned room while eating an apple, laced with arsenic, sliced with an axe, while sharpening an arrow? So many possibilities!
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OMG! FOMO! If there was an A to Z Challenge for May, FOMO would be such a great theme. (Thank God there’s not an A to Z Challenge for May though, because … life!)
I would not wanna be in an air-conditioned room with an axe-wielding, arsenic-carrying maniac trying to text on his apple device. No thank you. On the other hand, thanks for stopping by with the idea!
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Ideas are my gig…they’re what I do LOL
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I guess apoplexy.
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Oooh, I gotta look that up. I would have guessed apoplexy could be a cause of death, like asphyxiation for example. But can you use apoplexy as a murder weapon? Hmmm … where there’s a will, there’s someone not getting their share who might resort to apoplexy I suppose. Just gotta figure out a way!
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Air conditioner, please be air conditioner. I like this theme, I do hope you have more than 9 lives.
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Haha! How many lives did Wile E. Coyote get? I might need that many. Wile’s recovery time is nothing short of amazing. I’ll have to follow his techniques. I hope we have a branch of the Acme company somewhere near me! Thanks for stopping by.
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Acme should be your supply house for the first, I think trying to have supply houses for each letter would be too challenging.
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That’s EXACTLY what I was going to say!!!!! Arsenic is so old lace…
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I saw what you did there. And nicely done too!
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😁
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I am SO looking forward to this! It’s going to be FUN. I don’t know what that says about you and me (or maybe I do…)
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Ha! Some things you just don’t wanna know, right?
That Roadrunner sure had fun. Wile E Coyote? Not so much by the end. And the end came often!
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Ah gee… I was hoping you’d get really outlandish and use the air conditioner!!! 😉
Calen~
Impromptu Promptlings
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Don’t rule it out so fast! Like any good suspense writer (I’m not saying I’m one, just that I’m trying to be like one), I can only leave you with a cliffhanger so you’ll metaphorically turn the page and come back April 1 to find out. And if I survive, there’s always April 3 and on and on we go.
Oh, the fun we’re about to embark on!
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LOL… Have a feeling it will be an interesting month!
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This is undoubtedly the most creative A to Z Theme I’ve seen in 3 years! DonnaEve said it best!! 🙂
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You’re so kind, Joanne. Don’t change that.
And accurate too, about DonnaEve. She says a lot of things best. Pick up a copy of The Education of Dixie Dupree and you’ll see what I mean. But we have to be careful about telling her — otherwise she might get a big(ger) head. I’m joking, of course, but I’ll deny it if I ever meet her.
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Look at you – plugging my book on your blog. Maybe I shouldn’t be so thrilled to read about your offing 26 times. 😉
(seriously, thank you)
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Thanks – now I have to go check out DonnaEve 😀
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This is gonna be fun? Is that wrong?
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Oh, you’re cracking me up, Michelle. Wrong? Lordy, yes, it’s probably wrong in so many ways but we’ll turn our head during April and march onward. If Wile E. Coyote can do it so well for so long, it must not be wrong. Right?
Now I’m all confused. I only know “fun” and “wrong” should not go together, so we have that going for us.
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Sounds good to me! I’m in!
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I can’t wait! What fun! I wonder what you’ll choose for X. You’ve got my interest and I choose Air Conditioner, just because it’s so unlikely and I’d love to read how you make it work =)
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I wonder what I’ll choose for X too! Great minds, we’re thinking alike.
But I know the choice for A already. It’s gonna be
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Also, Julie, I just tried to visit your blog and it says POOF, this blog has disappeared. (That’s a paraphrase, not a quote.)
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Thanks for letting me know, John. It would seem I messed up somehow. All fixed now, thanks to you! Direct link is http://jreadinglife.blogspot.com/
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Good thing I wasn’t dead yet!
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I love this idea. I can’t wait to see how it goes.
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I’m kinda worried about how it goes, but I’m glad you’re up for it, Heather. Sit back and enjoy my demise! Night after night after …
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Thanks for visiting me! Your entry put a big grin on my face – TOTALLY NEEDED! The idea is brilliant and I’d be a regular visitor! Looking forward to your book too!
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Well you sure know how to instantly become one of my favorite people. My book looks forward to you, too. Only, first I have to snag a literary agent. Working on that! Have fun in April, and I’ll see you then.
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This sounds like a scream. I’ll be around to follow your unfortunate demises in April. Curious about how you kill someone with an air conditioner – not that I’m going to try it!
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Curiosity killed the cat — but that’s not a hint to the letter “C.” Thanks for dropping by, Nick, I’ll head your way this afternoon. Too many meetings on Tuesdays.
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That’s a very intriguing theme! I wonder what weapons you’ll come up with for Q, X and Z! All the best and happy blogging! 🙂
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You’re on to something there, Shweta. The back half of the alphabet poses many more challenges. As if the front half wasn’t challenging enough already! Thanks and happy blogging right back at ya.
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Good luck with the challenge. Can’t wait to read your posts! Have a great day. 😊
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Your theme sounds hilarious. Good luck with it!
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Thanks, AJ. I’m gonna need all the luck I can get for the entire month.
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I’m sure you’ll do just fine. Hang in there! So far, yours is the first I’ve run across that will be featuring flash fiction…
John Holton
A to Z Challenge Co-Host
The Sound Of One Hand Typing
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I remembered what your theme was just before I went to check! Ha. And it’s a good one. I’m going to enjoy following that. In fact, I already thought of several qualifying words, so it’ll be fun to see if any match what you ultimately choose.
Thanks for stopping by.
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I have a feeling people are going to be let down when they see what I put together, as quite a few of them are proper names, and I have a few common abbreviations in there. I’ll be open to anything people have. Kind of like my Friday Five, but without the music…
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I disagree on the let down part. From what I’ve seen in my limited experience (I only learned about the A to Z challenge on March 31 last year, so quickly participated), this community is awesome. They lean much toward inspiring than let down.
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This is fantastic! Can’t wait to read more!
Lisa / Tales from the Love Shaque
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Thanks, Lisa. Long as I survive, you’ll have more to read!
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wow. sounds like fun! cool theme
Djinnia and the English Language
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Why thank you, Mandy. It should be fun … for the reader. Me, not so much.
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Ooh, this is dark but I like it. 😉
Good luck with the challenge and my vote is for death by apple!
Cait @ Click’s Clan
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It’s only dark for me. For much of the world, this would really brighten up a day. I only base that on people’s reaction when they meet me, but first impressions aren’t always accurate, right?
Thanks for coming by, Cait. Hope to see you around!
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You certainly kicked off this post in an intriguing way. This sounds like a fun ride ahead.
Have a great April A to Z!
Arlee Bird
Tossing It Out
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Hey Arlee,
Thanks for stopping by. I visited your blog earlier in the week and tried to leave a comment but I couldn’t get it to go through after a few tries. Unless I’m one a those knuckleheads that keeps trying when it’s working and my comment showed up three times. Yikes. I better head over to investigate. Regardless, have a great time with the A to Z and I’ll see you around.
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I don’t recall if you commented or not–certainly not 3 times. Sometime WordPress bloggers have a difficult time commenting on a Blogger site. You could consider opening up a Blogger account and then just leaving the link to your blog–that gives you easier access to comment on Blogger and provides an alternate way of finding your blog. Hope you can figure it out.
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Can’t wait to read your posts. Have added you to my blogroll at http://candacecarrabus.com
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Blogroll, alright! I mean, that sounds like a good thing. It’s also one more thing I don’t understand out here in the Interwebz, but hey that should never stop anything, right?! Thanks for coming by, Candace. Enjoy the A to Z! Should be a hoot.
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ha ha. It’s a linky list of sites on my blog for people who come by my blog to maybe-hopefully click over to your blog. Sharing is caring! I’m an A to Z virgin but looking forward to the fun. I’m not actually doing the challenge. I’m making one of my characters write it. Vi Parker of the Dream Horse Mysteries is penning her Chronicle of a Cranky Horsewoman. See ya round the blogosphere!
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Fascinating! That is a truly unusual topic, can’t wait to follow along!
A-to-Z-er Jetgirl visiting via Forty, c’est Fantastique
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