Shortest Books I’d Ever Write
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I just finished writing an 84,000-word manuscript. It took me approximately 150,000 words to arrive at the final count. So now, let’s the opposite. A blog comment a week ago got me thinking about the shortest book I’d ever write. So here is my list of the Top 9 Thinnest Books I’d write, based on my personal history. Your list may vary.
9. List-Making for Dummies
8. Successful Pickup Lines
7. Query Letters that Charmed Literary Agents
6. Driver’s Ed 101 & Parenting 101 (Special two-page edition)
5. The Jack-in-the-Box Diet
4. The Joy of Socks
3. My Little Book of Gourmet Vegan Recipes
2. Fun with Prologues
1. What Men Understand About Women
Eat, Play, Sleep didn’t make the list because I wouldn’t be able to come up with an opening line for two of the three chapters. That book shall remain unwritten for the time being.
What’s the title of the thinnest book you’d write? Tell me in the Comments!
JD Frain 
How about:
A PRACTICAL GUIDE TO ENTROPY (available while stocks last)
MY KIDS’ FAVORITE DAD JOKES
COLIN D SMITH’S MOST ENGAGING COMMENtsssssssssss *zzzzzzzzzzzzz*
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Oh Colin, I could only write the Foreword for “My Kids’ Favorite Dad Jokes.” But then, unfortunately, none of my kids would get a single page written.
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1. MY PRIZE WINNING FLASH FICTION
2. MY DAY 9/20/16 ON JURY DUTY. zzzzzzzzzzzz
3. THE JOY OF LAUNDRY
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Technically, flash fiction will be a thin book whether it wins a prize or not. I guess if it doesn’t win a prize, then “My Prize-Winning Flash Fiction” will be one of those blank books where you can have lots of pages for other people to write flash fiction.
Hey, maybe you can put a writing prompt on every left-hand page. Then put your flash fiction piece beneath it, and then encourage the book owner to write their own on the right-hand page. It’s sorta like a pre-filled diary kinda thingy.
Yeah, okay, back to the drawing board on that one. I think I’ll stay with my WIP…
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Colin, as a physicist’s kid, you’re always going to warm my heart with an entropy joke. On John’s list, I have to say I love #8!
I cannot write a thin book. Perhaps “Diane’s shortest sentences” would be negligible.
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Diane, one of my favorite writer quotes come (allegedly) from James Michener, who said:
“In six pages, I can’t even say ‘hello.'”
I don’t think he had a thin book in him either.
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My thinnest books:
How To Train A Fish
Sleeping With Lions
The Narcoleptic Writer
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Huh. I must be tired. I’ve got a sleep thing going with 2 and 3. 🙂
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I would buy How to Train a Fish. I’m teaching ours to swim. I never realized how talented I was. Not to brag or anything, but I’m borderline genius with my technique. Might take this show to the ocean.
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Be sure to do a video. 😉
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Nice! Me and Nemo on YouTube, coming your way…
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